| Introduction In recent weeks some things have come to light concerning statements made by Paige Patterson, who at the time was the president of Southwestern Theological Seminary in the Dallas/Fort Worth area and a leading voice in the Southern Baptist Convention. Dr. Patterson, intentionally or unintentionally, made light of the situation of several women who had been physically abused by their husbands including one who showed up in church with two black eyes because her husband had beaten her (you can read more about it here). At the time, he said from the pulpit that he was happy she got the black eyes because eventually it led to her husband repenting. He since then has tried to explain what he meant, and in context, his explanation makes some sense. But even his explanation betrays an incredible insensitivity to the plight of abused women. I bring up this incident with Dr. Patterson because it is a recent one, and not to condemn Baptist. Presbyterians have the same ability to be insensitive to the plight of abused women that Baptist, Lutherans, Methodists, and every other denominational flavor have. I think conservative Christianity as a whole has turned, if not a blind one, a very myopic eye to the issue of domestic abuse. I was thinking about how the #ME TOO movement first struck me. My first thought was, "Here we go. A bunch of liberal women looking for attention." While there may be false accusations in that movement, our first reaction should never be dismissive. As a church of Jesus Christ, made up of people who are filled with the Holy Spirit, we must realize that all real abuse (physical, sexual, manipulative) is sinful. At its core, abuse is based on the idolatrous ideal that one can punish or use people as one sees fit because he or she stand in the place of God. Abuse of any kind dehumanizes a human whose dignity is found in the image of God he/she bears. Abuse of the one created in God's image is abuse of God himself. Dr. Patterson's comments sadly demonstrate what I fear has been the general attitude of the conservative Christian church. I. Abuse Is a Violation of One of the Most Basic Christian Duty: Loving Our Neighbor. A. The lawyer got it right that everything that is in the Bible concerning our relationship with God can be summarized under these two headings: love God and love others, Lk. 10:25-28. B. He understood how tall of a task that was, so he tried to find a way out (justify himself for not doing what he knew he should do): who is my neighbor? Lk. 10:29 C. In answering his question, Jesus demonstrates how abuse is completely and utterly incompatible with loving your neighbor. 1. The main point of the parable is that your neighbor is anyone who is in need, in front of you, and you have the means to help. 2. In showing who our neighbor is and how we are to act toward him or her, Jesus sheds a lot of light on the issue of abuse. a. The man had been abused by robbers, Luke 10:30. b. Various religious leaders decided to ignore the issue because they had more pressing matters (so they thought), Luke 10:31-32. c. The Samaritan, the one despised by the conservative religious world of the time, does what God expects his church to do, Luke 10:33-35. 1) Notice that loving your neighbor includes looking at him/her with compassion, 33b. 2) Notice that loving your neighbor brings healing instead of injury, 34. 3) Notice that loving your neighbor leads to wholeness instead of tearing apart, 35. D.The command to love our neighbor is not based on how loveable they are, but on the fact that they bear the image of God even is the most degenerate state they may be. Jam. 3:9– With it we bless our God and Father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in the similitude of God. Gen. 1:26-27– Then God said, "Let Us make man in Our image, according to Our likeness; let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, over the birds of the air, and over the cattle, over all the earth and over every creeping thing that creeps on the earth." So God created man in His ownimage; in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them. II. A Careful Response to Abuse Does not Throw Out the Baby of Biblical Roles for Men and Women with the Bathwater. A. Abuse, especially spousal abuse (husbands get abused too) is often based on a corruption of the biblical teaching on gender roles. B. However, right belief in and proper practice of what the Bible teaches concerning the role of men and women in the family and in the church will NEVER lead to abuse. 1. This is important for us to say and understand because the immediate reaction to the abuse of women has been to throw away all that the Bible teaches concerning the God-ordained roles of men and women in the church and in the family. 2. As the people of God who have been redeemed by the blood of Jesus Christ, we cannot and must not want to solve a problem, an immensely serious problem, by rebelling against what the Bible says. 3. The best solution for the problem of abuse in the church is a right understanding of what God calls us to be and do as men and women – both created in God's image and both created with different functions. C. In order for us to be satisfied and fulfilled with this solution, three things must be true of us: 1. We must be born again so that we can have eyes to see and hearts to love what God loves; 2. We must be convinced that God is good and so would only give us what is good and would not withhold anything good from us; 3. We must be convinced that the Bible is the inspired, inerrant, and authoritative Word of God to which we must submit in all things. III. Complementarians vs. Egalitarians A. In understanding of gender roles in the family and in the church, the evangelical church is divided into two general camps: complementarians and egalitarians. B. Complementarians believe that God has given different but equally important roles to men and women in the family and in the church. 1. These roles complement each other (thus complementarians) and if either is missing, we don't have completeness. 2. This position sees in the Bible distinct male functions and female functions. a. Generally, then, if a woman was to do what was a male function, she would be sinning. b. The same would be true if a man was to regularly fulfil a female function. C. The egalitarian position teaches that all the differences in gender roles in the Bible were social constructs. 1. That means that the different functions that the Bible assigns to men and women were so attached to the culture of the time the texts were written that they have no universal authoritative application. 2. Therefore, other than biological and physiological differences, there is no function in the family and in the church that is distinctively a male function or female function. a. The area that this idea is applied the most is who should be officers in the church. b. The egalitarian position usually teaches that the pastorate and eldership should be open to women. 3. I want you to know, brothers and sisters, that the egalitarian position is a hellish doctrine that brings great disgrace to God and really muddies our understanding of the Gospel because the female/male role distinction was designed by God in order for us to better understand the way Christ saves and sanctifies his Church and how his Church responds to him. D.Brothers and sisters, the solution to the sin of abuse is not wrong thinking in this area. 1. Dismissing the roles that our good God in his authoritative Word gave to us will not lead to godliness. 2. On the other hand, any variation of complementarianism that ascribes superiority, greater worth and value to the man is also a hellish position and will result in women being subjugated, abused, and enslaved. IV. The Explanation for the Current Mess in This Area Is Actually Thousands of Years Old. A. God created humanity in his image as male and female – not ontological difference like the Trinity, Gen. 1:26-27. B. God created Adam first, Gen. 2:7. 1. Even in the state of perfection, before any sin had been committed, man and society were in state of incompletion, 2:18a (not good to be alone). 2. So, God created the woman to bring completion to his creation, Gen. 1:31 (all verygood). C. God created the woman with a specific function: to be a helper fit for the man. Gen. 2:18– And the Lord God said, "It isnot good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him." 1. God had all the animals pass before Adam and nothing was fit for him because nothing in creation was equal in glory and worth to the man, Gen. 2:19-20 (But for Adam there was not found a helper comparable to him). 2. So, God brought Eve to Adam – an equal being but with complementary function – to help him fulfill his God-given calling of exercising dominion over creation (managing creation on behalf of God). a. This word helperis interesting because other than in Gen. 2, it is always used with God being the one who provides the help. Ps. 121:1-2– I will lift up my eyes to the hills—From whence comes my help? My help comesfrom the Lord, Who made heaven and earth. b. Being the divinely appointed helper is a high office. D.It is very important for us to see that God called this arrangement very good, Gen. 1:31. 1. It was the entrance of sin into the world that caused all the confusion in the roles that God gave men and women that we have today. 2. Even in the curse itself that God pronounced upon humanity as the result of their sin, we can see that God had different spheres of authority in mind when he said that the woman was the man's helper. Gen. 3:16– To the woman He said: "I will greatly multiply your sorrow and your conception; in pain you shall bring forth children; your desire shall befor your husband, and he shall rule over you." a. As the result of sin, the women's desire became for her husband. 1) That means that her desire was for the office of her husband. 2) Her natural inclination became to usurp the authority and function of the husband. b. The man was also cursed. 1) Instead of loving leadership, his nature became to lord it over the woman. 2) He became selfish in his leadership. 3. So, the differences in function between men and women are a God-created, God-appointed, necessary, good, and beautiful thing. 4. The problem is the distorted practice of it. V. It Is Also Very Important for Us to Realize That This Complementarian View of Gender Roles Is not a Social Construct Based on Archaic Societal Norms That Are no Longer Part of Our Culture. A. The most maligned passage of the Bible on this issue is likely 1 Tim. 2:12. 2 Tim. 2:12– And I do not permit a woman to teach or to have authority over a man, but to be in silence. 1. Usually the outcry goes as follows: a. This must certainly be cultural. b. This must be a reflection of an evil patriarchal society designed to oppress women. c. It is certainly not for an enlightened bunch like modern Christians. 2. And yet, Paul grounded his exhortation, not on the social morals of his time, but on the account of creation itself, which transcends all cultures. 2 Tim. 2:13-14– For Adam was formed first, then Eve. And Adam was not deceived, but the woman being deceived, fell into transgression. 3. In all honesty, 2 Tim. 2 is a difficult passage to understand as a whole. b. Verse 12 is straight forward – God has appointed roles in the church for men and women that complement each other. B. That is also true in the family: loving leadership and godly submission. Eph. 5:22-23, 25– Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is head of the wife, as also Christ is head of the church; and He is the Savior of the body…. Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her…. VI. If These Gender Roles Are Good for Us, Why Is It That They Rub Us So Wrongly? A. The first and foundational reason is the rebellion in our hearts – the natural man and woman do not want to fulfill the rolls God calls us to fulfill. B. Second, these roles have been misused and abused. 1. Women have abused their roles by trying to usurp the male role. 2. As far as the type of abuse that we started this sermon with, men are largely at fault. a. Men have abused their authority and lorded over the women in their lives. b. Even though we live in a society that is against all things masculine and accusations of abuse may in certain cases be exaggerated, we are here because men have largely failed to be godly men. 1) Think of all the sex abuse scandals in Christendom just in the last 30 years. 2) Look at how the church has put up with abusive husband under the misguided label of godly submission. VII. The Solution to the Problem of Abuse in the Home and in the Church Lays Largely on Men's Shoulders. A. God calls us to loving leadership, both at home and at the church. B. The ultimate man, the Lord Jesus Christ, shows us how we do that. Mk. 10:41-45– And when the ten heard it,they began to be greatly displeased with James and John. But Jesus called them to Himselfand said to them, "You know that those who are considered rulers over the Gentiles lord it over them, and their great ones exercise authority over them. Yet it shall not be so among you; but whoever desires to become great among you shall be your servant. And whoever of you desires to be first shall be slave of all. For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give His life a ransom for many." 1. The solution to the problem of abuse is not for men to abdicate of their God-given authority. 2. But for us, men, to exercise that authority in loving, servant leadership. 3. If every time we exercised our authority in the several spheres we are in was with the purpose of serving those around us like Jesus serves us, there will not be true abuse anymore. 4. Accusations might still exist, but they would all be false.
There is no manliness in trying to lord it over someone else. It is actually a cowardly move to try to abuse someone because invariably it is going to be someone weaker than you. The solution is not giving up the roles and functional distinctions that God has appointed. The ultimate solution for abuse is for believing men and women to fulfill their roles given to them by a good God.
http://olympiabp.blogspot.com/2018/06/a-complementarians-word-on-abuse-lk.html
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